How did we get here?
Many of you are probably wondering how we got here. We often wonder the same thing. It has taken us a while to be able to revisit the ugly. Don't get me wrong, it is all ugly, but it takes a while to revisit the day that would change your life forever. My mom heart just wasn't ready for that yet.
At the beginning of July, Cooper was complaining of pain in his legs, We saw his docs and everyone figured that it was growing pains. He had grown 2 1/2 inches since December. The pain seemed to come and go and wasn't changing his activity level.
After Evyn was born on July 15th, Cooper was continuing his ice hockey lessons. We noticed that he was regressing. Cooper told us that he was afraid of falling and that his legs were hurting from week to week. When Evyn was 2 1/2 weeks old Cooper spiked a fever of 103 and got a tummy bug. This was odd for our child who doesn't get fevers. With a newborn in the house, we were super concerned about her with a fever that high. Once again we went to the doc and they said it was a virus. All went away and life returned to normal. We were seeing some behavioral things from Coop related to what the doctors deemed as growing pains. Lots of whining, complaining. However, we had just had a baby, so behavioral changes in a kid who has a new baby sibling, all completely normal.
The Tuesday before his diagnosis Cooper went to his 5 year well visit to get all of his paperwork for kindergarten completed. I pushed the leg issue a big more and they referred us to a pediatric orthopedist just in case he suffered an injury from ice hockey. The orthopedist couldn't see us until September 18th.
My mom gut felt that something was off. I wasn't convinced that this was an orthopedic issue. Family members had seen some strange things too while visiting the baby. For some reason, who knows why, my brain automatically thought we were dealing with something serious. I even looked into leukemia symptoms...why? I don't know. Isn't that the cardinal sin of healthcare...googling symptoms and illness? I didn't want to be THAT person who goes into the doctor thinking the worst, especially when just had his well visit. However, a very dear friend of mine from school has always told me, "you have a good gut instinct, ALWAYS trust your gut." So I did...and I was right.
Saturday morning we went to get routine blood work done. They told us they expected to have the results back in about 5 days. Within hours the pediatrician called us and said we were looking at anything from a lab mistake to leukemia. They said his hemoglobin and red blood cell counts were dangerously low. They gave us the choice to have the labs repeated at Frederick Memorial, but if they came back the same they would airlift him to Hopkins or Children's in DC. We made the decision with baby in tow, to go to Hopkins right away and go to the pediatric ER.
This began the longest drive of our life and what would be the worst day of our life. Within about 2 hours of being at the ER we had our preliminary diagnosis of leukemia.
As a parent you never think that this is ever where you will be as a family. You never think that doctors will ever have to break this kind of news to you about your "healthy" 5 year old kiddo. I have learned so much that I NEVER wanted to know over the last 8 days, but here we are, and what can you do other than deal with the cards you've been handed. If I have learned anything though, it is that 1. Perspective is everything.
2. ALWAYS trust your gut, because you just might be right.
3. Hug your littles every chance you get.
At the beginning of July, Cooper was complaining of pain in his legs, We saw his docs and everyone figured that it was growing pains. He had grown 2 1/2 inches since December. The pain seemed to come and go and wasn't changing his activity level.
After Evyn was born on July 15th, Cooper was continuing his ice hockey lessons. We noticed that he was regressing. Cooper told us that he was afraid of falling and that his legs were hurting from week to week. When Evyn was 2 1/2 weeks old Cooper spiked a fever of 103 and got a tummy bug. This was odd for our child who doesn't get fevers. With a newborn in the house, we were super concerned about her with a fever that high. Once again we went to the doc and they said it was a virus. All went away and life returned to normal. We were seeing some behavioral things from Coop related to what the doctors deemed as growing pains. Lots of whining, complaining. However, we had just had a baby, so behavioral changes in a kid who has a new baby sibling, all completely normal.
The Tuesday before his diagnosis Cooper went to his 5 year well visit to get all of his paperwork for kindergarten completed. I pushed the leg issue a big more and they referred us to a pediatric orthopedist just in case he suffered an injury from ice hockey. The orthopedist couldn't see us until September 18th.
My mom gut felt that something was off. I wasn't convinced that this was an orthopedic issue. Family members had seen some strange things too while visiting the baby. For some reason, who knows why, my brain automatically thought we were dealing with something serious. I even looked into leukemia symptoms...why? I don't know. Isn't that the cardinal sin of healthcare...googling symptoms and illness? I didn't want to be THAT person who goes into the doctor thinking the worst, especially when just had his well visit. However, a very dear friend of mine from school has always told me, "you have a good gut instinct, ALWAYS trust your gut." So I did...and I was right.
Saturday morning we went to get routine blood work done. They told us they expected to have the results back in about 5 days. Within hours the pediatrician called us and said we were looking at anything from a lab mistake to leukemia. They said his hemoglobin and red blood cell counts were dangerously low. They gave us the choice to have the labs repeated at Frederick Memorial, but if they came back the same they would airlift him to Hopkins or Children's in DC. We made the decision with baby in tow, to go to Hopkins right away and go to the pediatric ER.
This began the longest drive of our life and what would be the worst day of our life. Within about 2 hours of being at the ER we had our preliminary diagnosis of leukemia.
As a parent you never think that this is ever where you will be as a family. You never think that doctors will ever have to break this kind of news to you about your "healthy" 5 year old kiddo. I have learned so much that I NEVER wanted to know over the last 8 days, but here we are, and what can you do other than deal with the cards you've been handed. If I have learned anything though, it is that 1. Perspective is everything.
2. ALWAYS trust your gut, because you just might be right.
3. Hug your littles every chance you get.
Kristy- you have always been “one of those moms” that impressed me. You really are such an amazing momma and this “gut” situation just solidifies that. I’ll never forget your first day to drop off Coop to me- you had thought of everything to make Cooper’s transition smooth and on top of that, you thought of everything to make my transition smooth too. I’m so thankful for our friendship that has turned to family. Hug my buddy extra tight for me tonight! 😘
ReplyDeleteThe sun can shine through the rain. Stay positive ... You can get upset, you can get down, you can get angry, but dont stay there too long .... When I find myself crying in frustration, or weakness, or despair ... I get it out ... then look in the mirror and read my mantra "the devil whispered in my ear "you are not strong enough to withstand the storm" ... Today I whispered in the devil's ear " I am the storm"". Stay strong, but let yourself cry! Sending so much love, strength, and prayers your way! #SuperCooper
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